“The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place.” — George Bernard Shaw
Why Missing the Point Happens (And Why It’s Driving Us All Crazy)
Have you ever sat through a conversation—maybe at work, maybe at dinner with friends—and thought, “Wait, that’s not even what we were talking about!”? Welcome to the frustrating world of “Missing the Point.” It’s not just a casual misstep in communication; it’s a full-blown fallacy that can derail arguments, confuse entire debates, and leave everyone scratching their heads.
Missing the Point happens when someone draws a conclusion that doesn’t logically follow from the argument at hand. It’s like watching someone set up a chessboard, explain the rules, and then suddenly start playing Monopoly. You’re left wondering: How did we even get here?
This fallacy is sneaky. It’s not always intentional. Often, people are so determined to stick to their preconceived ideas that they’ll force a connection between unrelated points just to prove themselves right. And if you’re not paying attention, you might just nod along, none the wiser.
“We Need More Police Because Crime Rates Went Up” (Wait, What?)
“Logic will get you from A to B. Imagination will take you everywhere.” — Albert Einstein
Here’s an example: Let’s say there’s an uptick in burglaries in your neighborhood. Someone suggests, “It must be because more people are moving into the area.” Sounds plausible, right? But hold on—how do we know that’s the reason? Maybe it’s because of economic hardship, or a lack of resources for law enforcement, or even a statistical anomaly. The conclusion doesn’t logically follow from the evidence.
Or take this one: “The CEO has a law degree, so we’d better make sure our operations are legal.” Huh? Having a law degree doesn’t automatically mean someone’s an expert in corporate compliance. The connection is flimsy at best.
This kind of reasoning is everywhere. Politicians do it all the time. They’ll trot out a random fact, slap it onto their agenda, and hope no one notices the logical gap. For example: “Our education system is failing. That’s why we need tax cuts.” Wait a minute—what does one have to do with the other? But if they say it with enough confidence (and maybe throw in some emotional buzzwords), people will buy it.
Why We Fall for It
“In the age of information, ignorance is a choice.” — Donny Miller
Here’s the thing: Missing the Point works because most people don’t take the time to break down arguments. We’re busy. We’re distracted. And honestly, sometimes we just don’t care enough to dig deeper. If a conclusion sounds reasonable, we’ll often accept it without question.
Plus, we’re hardwired to trust authority. If someone speaks with enough conviction—whether it’s a politician, a boss, or even a friend—we’re more likely to go along with their logic, even if it doesn’t make sense. It’s like our brains are programmed to think, “Well, they sound like they know what they’re talking about, so they must be right.”
But here’s the kicker: this kind of lazy reasoning can have real consequences. Policies get made, decisions get approved, and beliefs get cemented—all based on flawed arguments.
How to Spot (and Avoid) Missing the Point
“The first principle is that you must not fool yourself—and you are the easiest person to fool.” — Richard Feynman
The good news? You don’t have to fall for it. Here’s how to stay sharp:
- Ask Questions: Whenever someone makes a claim, ask yourself: Does this conclusion really follow from the evidence? If there’s a gap in the logic, call it out.
- Stay Calm: People who miss the point often rely on emotional appeals to distract you. Don’t get swept up in the theatrics; focus on the facts.
- Practice Active Listening: Pay attention to what’s actually being said, not just how it’s being said. Break the argument down into its components and look for inconsistencies.
- Learn to Say “That Doesn’t Follow”: It’s okay to push back. If someone’s argument doesn’t make sense, politely point out the disconnect. You don’t have to be confrontational—just curious.
- Think Before You Speak: Before you make your own arguments, double-check your logic. Make sure your conclusions are based on sound reasoning, not assumptions or unrelated points.
Why It Matters
“An argument is not about who’s right, but about what’s right.” — Unknown
At its core, Missing the Point is a reminder of how easily communication can go off the rails. It’s not just about winning arguments or proving someone wrong. It’s about striving for clarity, logic, and understanding in a world that desperately needs more of all three.
When we take the time to think critically and question what we hear, we’re not just protecting ourselves from bad arguments—we’re helping to create a culture of accountability and reason. And honestly? The world could use a little more of that right now.
References
- Aristotle’s Rhetoric — The original breakdown of fallacies, including Ignoratio Elenchi.
- Thinking, Fast and Slow by Daniel Kahneman — For insights into why our brains take cognitive shortcuts.
- You Are Not So Smart by David McRaney — A fun, accessible look at common logical fallacies.
- The Art of Thinking Clearly by Rolf Dobelli — Packed with practical tips for spotting flawed reasoning.
- Everyday conversations with people who love arguing but hate making sense.
Related Reads You Might Enjoy
Why Thinking “In a Certain Respect and Simply” Can Wreck Your Arguments (and Your Life)
Why Affirming the Consequent Can Make You Look Like an Idiot (and How to Avoid It)
The Fallacy of Accident: Why General Rules Don’t Always Work in the Real World
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